Author: Ryan

We Can Do Hard Things: Answers to Life’s 20 Questions

Background

Published in May 2025, We Can Do Hard Things: Answers to Life’s 20 Questions is a collaborative work by Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle. Drawing from their personal experiences, including Glennon’s anorexia diagnosis, Amanda’s breast cancer, and the death of Abby’s brother, the authors explore twenty recurring questions that address aspects of human existence such as identity, purpose, relationships, and resilience. Through conversations with over 100 individuals, including public figures like Sara Bareilles, Brandi Carlile, and Ina Garten, the book compiles insights aimed at guiding readers through life’s challenges.

We Can Do Hard Things
We Can Do Hard Things

My Thoughts

This book was such a disappointment. Quite honestly, I couldn’t get through it. I kept trying to push through, but I just couldn’t make it. Hopefully, it redeems itself in the end, but I sincerely doubt it. I knew nothing about the book other than it was in the self-help section. I like to just pick up a book and read and occasionally that backfires. This experience was one of those times.

It took me a few weeks to put my finger on it, but the book appears to operate under the following assumptions:

  • Everyone was and continues to be a victim.
  • Everyone is living with “trauma”.
  • Everyone has permission to do anything they want.
  • Everyone else should honor, respect, and even applaud whatever it is you want.
  • Judgement and resentment only stem from others. Your opinions about everyone else isn’t judgement, it’s fact.

First, a quick pet peeve of mine. Trauma actually has a definition in the DSM-5-TR, “Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence.” (The word is thrown around so much in this book it lost the actual meaning. By context, most of what was defined as “trauma” barely rose to the level of irritation.) You pretending to be sick so “everyone else knew their roles” does not count as trauma. (A quote from the book.) Neither does feeling embarrassed, being uncomfortable, or not getting that pony you ever so wanted.

Second, we all have problems. Yet, here is a novel idea, perhaps you could attempt to solve those problems rather than looking around for someone to blame them on? We understand you are the center of your universe, but please, get over yourselves! Maybe develop some listening skills and gain some perspective. You may even thank your parents for not instantly giving into every demand that crosses your mind. Being able to choose integrity over convenience is called building character.

You also don’t get to do everything you want. Every choice has accountability connected to that choice. If a homicidal maniac decides that living according to their “authentic self” is to commit murder, that really isn’t ok. Even if they “sat with their feelings” and truly felt like that is who they are.

Finally, the rest of us really don’t have to put up with your issues. Back to the homicidal maniac, if they take someone’s life, they shouldn’t be surprised that some of us will eventually stop them from doing it. We may even inflict some “trauma” on that individual so they and others know it isn’t ok as well.

We all live in a society and there are rules and norms we all live with. If you break those rules, there will be repercussions. Some of us may not want to be around you anymore. This is no less judging than you complaining about our behavior.

Recommendation

Don’t waste your time. There was an occasional good idea but it was like finding a Dorito floating in pure sewage. As much as I love Doritos, but it just wasn’t worth it.

No Man’s Land

Background

Published in 2016, No Man’s Land by David Baldacci follows John Puller, a U.S. Army Criminal Investigations Division special agent, as he reopens the case of his mother’s decades-old disappearance. When new evidence emerges that Puller’s father, a legendary Army general now suffering from dementia, may have been involved in her presumed death, Puller is forced to confront painful family secrets while unraveling a deeper government conspiracy. At the same time, a dangerous ex-convict begins a violent mission that eventually intersects with Puller’s investigation, leading to revelations that challenge everything he thought he knew about his past.

No Man's Land
No Man’s Land

My Thoughts

Not a bad ending to the Puller series. While Baldacci left it open for another, he still hasn’t done so as of 2025. However, Puller did show up in the Altee Pine novel Daylight which I’m reading now so who knows.

Anyway, I found myself relieved to be done with the Army side. My experience with the Army was not what was depicted in this series. Baldacci is always fun to read, because the content always seems close to life out in Virginia and around the military complex. However, there are subtle things he gets wrong that show he is an outsider looking in.

As for this novel, it was enjoyable. I particularly liked Paul’s last name being Rogers. It was appropriate.

Recommendation

Still a fun read.

The Escape

Background

Published in 2014, The Escape by David Baldacci follows John Puller, a U.S. Army investigator, as he is drawn into a high-stakes manhunt when his older brother Robert, a former Air Force officer convicted of treason, escapes from a maximum-security military prison. Tasked with capturing his brother, Puller must navigate a complex web of military secrets, political conspiracies, and personal loyalty. As he digs deeper, he begins to uncover evidence that Robert may have been framed, and that powerful forces are determined to keep the truth hidden at all costs.

The Escape
The Escape

My Thoughts

It was good to deal with the Robert issue and get it out in the open. Three books into the series seems to be appropriate. The female partner is becoming a little formulaic, but it works.

As usual, Baldacci delivers a fun book that seems to fly by.

Recommendation

It was worth the read.

The Forgotten

Background

Published in 2012, “The Forgotten” by David Baldacci follows Army Special Agent John Puller as he investigates the mysterious death of his aunt in a quiet Florida town. Though her passing was officially ruled accidental, Puller suspects foul play and uncovers a web of corruption, illegal activity, and hidden identities that reach beyond the local community. As he delves deeper, Puller confronts both dangerous adversaries and a conspiracy that threatens national security. The investigation becomes personal, testing his skills as a military investigator and his resolve as a family member seeking justice.

The Forgotten
The Forgotten

My Thoughts

Another area I have visited and have some familiarity with is the general part of Florida in the book. Baldacci mentions Desin and other areas along the panhandle. The city of Paradise was annexed into Gainesville, Florida in 2022. It is land locked and about 300 miles from where it is placed in the book. (I had to look that up.) This was the first time I saw Baldacci make that error.

Regardless, it was an engaging narrative and I enjoyed the book on the whole. There were a few times the dialogue was overblown and even a little cheesy. There were also some adult scenes that fortunately didn’t get too graphic or last very long.

Recommendation

Good enough to keep reading the series.

Zero Day

Background

Published in 2011, Zero Day by David Baldacci introduces military investigator John Puller, a former combat veteran now working for the U.S. Army’s Criminal Investigative Division. Puller is sent to a remote area in West Virginia to investigate the brutal murder of a military family, including a high-ranking officer. As he partners with local law enforcement, Puller uncovers a disturbing trail of violence and corruption that hints at a much larger conspiracy. His investigation leads him to confront not only physical dangers but also deep institutional secrets, forcing him to rely on both his investigative skills and military training.

Zero Day
Zero Day

My Thoughts

This was a fun read with a big ending. However, there was a lot of emphasis about how the Army does business that seemed a little off to me. Of course, that might be due to my bias with the Marines. Still, I enjoyed the book.

Recommendation

A solid Baldacci novel. I’m excited to get to the next books featuring Puller.

What I Wish I’d Known Before My Mission

Background

Published in 1996, What I Wish I’d Known Before My Mission by John Bytheway offers practical and spiritual insights for young members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who are preparing to serve as missionaries. The book draws from Bytheway’s own mission experience and reflections, addressing common misconceptions, emotional hurdles, and day-to-day realities of missionary service. Topics include dealing with homesickness, adjusting to rigorous schedules, understanding companionship dynamics, and maintaining personal spiritual growth. The goal is to help prospective missionaries enter the field with more accurate expectations and better preparation for the challenges and rewards of mission life.

What I Wish I'd Known Before My Mission
What I Wish I’d Known Before My Mission

My Thoughts

As my son is preparing for his mission, I came across What I Wish I’d Known Before My Mission in our kitchen. Naturally curious, I picked it up and gave it a read. It was a quick and held my attention, though it clearly reflects the time period in which it was originally written. Ironically, this book came out when I was serving my own mission, so I was not familiar with John Bytheway or his work till years afterward.

While researching the book, I found that it has been republished several times. My impression is that the updates were likely made to refresh the language, as the original version speaks in a style familiar to teenagers of the mid-1990s. (I have had some experience with this vernacular.) I worry that some of the references are old enough that they may not resonate with the current target demographic.

Despite the dated references, the core principles and advice remain strong. I especially appreciated the appendix, which provides simple historical background and helpful answers to common questions that missionaries might be asked. It is a thoughtful addition to an already solid resource.

Recommendation

I enjoyed it. The content was filled with concepts and language that resonated with me, particularly as it was written for my demographic 30 years ago. It also addressed a subject that has been on my mind recently. That said, I had not read it in the nearly three decades since its publication and likely would not have done so now if not for the fact that my son is preparing to leave soon.

Long Shadows

Background

Published in 2022, Long Shadows by David Baldacci follows seasoned investigator Amos Decker, known as the Memory Man, as he takes on a new case in Florida involving the brutal murders of a federal judge and her bodyguard. Tasked with uncovering the motive behind this high-profile crime, Decker is paired with a new partner, Special Agent Frederica White. As they dig into the judge’s past, they uncover conflicting clues and hidden connections that raise more questions than answers.

Long Shadows
Long Shadows

My Thoughts

It had been a while since the last time I read anything from the Memory Man series and I didn’t know this one existed. Though there was some finality to the plot, Baldacci could easily add another book or two.

The book was easily taken in and digested. I was reading some heavier medical texts just before I switched to this and I still was happily reading for the next couple of hours. There really is nothing like a good novel to keep you engaged and this one didn’t disappoint.

Recommendation

Good read with a familiar character.

Do Pause: You are not a To Do List

Background

Published in 2022, Do Pause: You Are Not a To-Do List by Robert Poynton explores the idea of intentionally stepping back from constant productivity to create space for reflection, awareness, and creativity. Drawing on his experience teaching improvisational techniques at Oxford and working with businesses, Poynton encourages readers to think of pauses not as breaks in action but as integral, active components of life and work. He presents different types of pauses, such as taking a breath, observing, or stopping altogether, as practical tools for navigating complex or fast-moving environments. Rather than offering time management strategies, the book redefines time itself as something we can engage with differently by shifting attention and perspective.

Do Pause You are not a To Do List
Do Pause You are not a To Do List

My Thoughts

This was a good reminder to slow down and enjoy life. I once caught one of my team outside smelling the flowers. He was a chaotic person and I had to send him to anger management at one point, but it brought me joy to see him taking a minute and enjoying something.

I think we all can do with a little more stillness in life. Particularly, at this point in time.

Recommendation

Good quick read.

Richard Bong: American’s #1 Ace Fighter Pilot of World War II

Background

Published in 2022, Richard Bong: American’s #1 Ace Fighter Pilot of World War II by Peter B. Mersky recounts the life and military career of Richard Ira Bong, the most successful American fighter pilot of World War II. The book traces Bong’s early life in Wisconsin, his training as a pilot in the Army Air Forces, and his rise to fame as he flew the P-38 Lightning in the Pacific Theater, ultimately achieving 40 confirmed aerial victories. The narrative details his combat missions, relationships with fellow pilots and commanders, and the public attention he received at home. It also covers his post-combat role as a test pilot and his untimely death in a plane crash shortly before the end of the war. Through official records, personal letters, and military analysis, the book provides a full portrait of Bong’s role in the war and his legacy in American aviation history.

Richard Bong: American's #1 Ace Fighter Pilot of World War II
Richard Bong: American’s #1 Ace Fighter Pilot of World War II

My Thoughts

This was an engaging book on a subject I knew nothing about. Fortunately, there are plenty of others who know the story. As I was reading it, I mentioned that Richard Bong State Recreation Area was named after the top fighter pilot in WWII. My deputy both knew where it was and his dad liked to hunt there.

Dick Bong’s life is inspiring and is something deserving of remembrance. In particular, as I read it so near to Memorial Day.

Recommendation

Great read and pretty engaging for a history book.

Armed with Good Intentions

Background

Published in 2022, Armed with Good Intentions by Wallo267 (Wallace Peeples) is a memoir that chronicles the author’s journey from incarceration to personal transformation and public influence. Drawing on his own life experiences, Wallo reflects on the mindset and choices that led to his imprisonment at a young age and the discipline and clarity he developed while serving a 20-year sentence. The book presents his story as a testament to using time wisely, embracing accountability, and finding purpose. Through anecdotes and direct commentary, he emphasizes the importance of internal change and the practical steps that helped him transition into a motivational speaker and entrepreneur after his release.

Armed with Good Intentions
Armed with Good Intentions

My Thoughts

I started reading this book at the same time as reading “We Can Do Hard Things” by Glennon Doyle et al. What a world of difference! Here is someone with actual problems who gained some perspective, broke the cycle, and is out to break that cycle for others just like him. After reading his story, I’m convinced he deserves all the wealth and success he has earned.

Recommendation

An inspiring story though the concepts and language is not for youth.