The Four Loves

Background

Published in 1960, “The Four Loves” is a non-fiction book written by C.S. Lewis on the nature of love. In this insightful work, Lewis explores love from a philosophical and Christian perspective. Expounding on four distinct categories of love:

  1. Storge: This refers to familial or natural affection, the love between family members, or the love that arises naturally, such as the love between parents and children.
  2. Philia: This represents friendship and the love between friends. It encompasses loyalty, camaraderie, and mutual respect.
  3. Eros: Eros refers to romantic or passionate love. It is associated with desire, attraction, and physical intimacy.
  4. Agape: Agape is unconditional love, often seen as divine or selfless love. It is characterized by compassion, generosity, and a genuine concern for the well-being of others.

Lewis delves into the complexities and nuances of each type of love. He examines their strengths, potential pitfalls, and how they relate to one another. Drawing from literature, theology, and personal experiences, Lewis offers profound reflections on the meaning and significance of love in our lives. “The Four Loves” is a timeless exploration of human relationships and emotions that continues to resonate with readers, offering wisdom and understanding on the nature of love.

The Four Loves
The Four Loves

My Thoughts

I can’t heap enough praise on this book. C.S. Lewis does not tell a story here, rather he is explaining, as plain as he can, the nature of love. I went through it a number of times and still think I’m just scratching the surface.

Recommendation

Read this book!

Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment

Background

Published in 2010, “Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love” is a self-help book written by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller. Drawing on extensive research in psychology and neuroscience, the book explores the concept of adult attachment and how it influences our romantic relationships. The authors present three attachment styles—secure, anxious, and avoidant—and explain how each style affects our behaviors, emotions, and expectations in relationships. They provide insights into the dynamics of attachment and offer practical advice on how to navigate challenges, improve communication, and build healthier, more fulfilling connections with our partners. By understanding our own attachment style and that of our partners, “Attached” seeks to provide valuable tools and strategies for creating and maintaining lasting love and security in relationships.

Attached
Attached

My Thoughts

I try to read another relationship book every so often to constantly improve my marriage and family relationships. Most tend to be pretty much the same but this one had a different spin. Of course, your upbringing and prior experiences would color your relationships but Levine and Heller were much more specific in their thoughts. I’m convinced that relationships aren’t quite as generalizable as they were made out to be here but I liked their take on how to cope with the various circumstances.

Recommendation

I talked about this one with my wife… High praise for these type of books.

Major Decisions

Background

Published in 2021, “Major Decisions” by Henry Eyring explores the complexities and challenges of college and making significant life choices. The book offers a balanced perspective on the decision-making process delving into various factors that influence major decisions, including personal values, societal pressures, and practical considerations. Eyring provides strategies and tools to navigate to help make decisions while emphasizing the importance of self-reflection, gathering information, and seeking guidance.

Major Decisions
Major Decisions

My Thoughts

There are a good many things in this book that I wish I had known before I started the college process or what I call the “unscripted” time after High School. (Of course, I don’t know that I would have listened if someone told me. In fact, they likely did…) I liked how Eyring broke down how to find out what you want to do and where to go from there. What would have been very handy was the idea that you should go to the school who caters to your needs.

Recommendation

Great book and worth the read.

Limitless

Background

Published in April of 2020, “Limitless” by Jim Kwik is a self-help book that explores methods and techniques to enhance cognitive abilities and unlock one’s full potential. With a focus on optimizing memory, learning, and overall brain performance, Kwik offers strategies and exercises to improve mental clarity, focus, and retention. Through anecdotes and insights, the book provides tools to overcome limitations, boost creativity, and cultivate a growth mindset.

Limitless
Limitless

My Thoughts

I remember when this book came out as the author hit the podcast circuit and did shows on a few that I was listening to at the time. I was interested but not enough to get the book. About a month ago, a Marine LtCol told me this would be an excellent book for a new course at the University where I work. He even went ahead and bought me a copy of the book. Thank you!

I have been reading it off and on since I received my copy. I’ve done some in print and some in audio but this isn’t a book you just read through and it’s done. This is a book that requires effort and exercises which slowed down my consumption considerably. I’ve enjoyed the process of getting through it but there wasn’t a ton of hidden gems that I was hoping to find. (Perhaps I have just read too many books that are similar. In fact, “Atomic Habits” was referenced directly in this book.) I will keep at the exercises and see where it takes me.

Recommendation

A great read but will take some time if you put the effort in.

Raising Your Spirited Child

Background

Published way back in 1991, “Raising Your Spirited Child” by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka is a guidebook for parents who have children with intense and challenging personalities. Kurcinka identifies these children as “spirited” and explains that they possess qualities such as high energy, sensitivity, persistence, and emotional intensity that, when properly channeled, can lead to great creativity, resilience, and success. However, she also acknowledges that these same qualities can cause conflicts with parents, teachers, and peers if not managed properly. Kurcinka provides practical strategies for understanding and nurturing spirited children, including tips for managing behavior, communicating effectively, and promoting healthy development. She emphasizes the importance of accepting and appreciating a child’s individuality and working with their unique strengths and weaknesses to help them thrive.

Raising Your Spirited Child
Raising Your Spirited Child

My Thoughts

I was very surprised to learn the book was from 1991 as even I was thinking, “This kid just needs a good beating…” a few times in the book. That was somewhat tongue in cheek though as I agree with most of her ideas.

There is a fine line between being sensitive to a child’s needs and being enabling or overindulgent. As a parent, I feel like I tread on that line on a daily basis.

Recommendation

Definitely worth the read and attention. Even if you don’t agree, the book will make you think a little bit about why you think the things you do.

The New Rules of Running

Background

Published in April of 2014, The New Rules of Running is a book about the latest and greatest thoughts on running. This book contains strategies and how to guides to help anyone become a successful runner.

The New Rules of Running
The New Rules of Running

My Thoughts

I really enjoyed this book as it had a little bit of something for everyone. In particular, I liked how it talked about stretching and made some comments about the newer recommendation against it. This book pointed out that the study that recommendation was based on was on younger people and that those people usually don’t have the same injuries as us older folks. That is the type of thing I want to hear in these books. Something that goes just a little deeper.

Recommendation

I like it. It is a good book to pick up if you are interested in running.

Beyond Order

Background

Published in March of 2021, “Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life” is the sequel to Jordan Peterson’s bestselling book, 12 Rules for Life. In this book, Peterson offers twelve new principles for navigating the complexities of life and finding meaning in a rapidly changing world. Drawing on a wide range of sources, including psychology, philosophy, and religion, Peterson explores topics such as the importance of responsibility, the dangers of ideologues, and the role of creativity in human flourishing. He also delves into personal experiences, including his struggles with addiction and his journey to recovery. Throughout the book, Peterson emphasizes the importance of individual agency and the need to take responsibility for one’s own life, while also acknowledging the challenges and limitations that we all face.

Beyond Order
Beyond Order

My Thoughts

I really enjoyed this book and, in particular, the reasons for fidelity in marriage and the defense of existing institutions. Dr. Peterson gives such a great argument for following these rules that it becomes hard to argue the point.

Recommendation

Great book. Worth multiple reads.

The Happiness Advantage

Background

Published back in 2010, “The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuel Success and Performance at Work” is a self-help book by Shawn Achor. The book argues that happiness is not just a byproduct of success, but rather a precursor to it. Achor presents seven principles that he believes can help individuals cultivate a positive mindset and improve their performance in various areas of life, including work, relationships, and health. These principles include focusing on strengths rather than weaknesses, cultivating optimism and gratitude, and building strong social connections. Achor draws on research from the fields of positive psychology and neuroscience to support his ideas, and includes practical exercises and strategies for readers to apply in their own lives.

The Happiness Advantage
The Happiness Advantage

My Thoughts

I believe I read this some time ago and I’ve read a dozen others like it in the time since. However, they all have a few things in common. 1) They all agree it is better to be happy than to be otherwise and 2) you can be happy no matter what is going on in your life. The key is really being thankful for what you have and in being of service to others.

However, this book was one of the first that studied happiness from a psychological perspective. They tried the science of what being in a good mood can do for your memory, cognitive abilities, creativity, and so on. In short, it helps.

Recommendation

A good book and helpful for inspiring.

A Hunter-Gatherer’s Guide to the 21st Century

Background

Published in September of 2021, A Hunter-Gatherer’s Guide to the 21st Century is the story of how modern life isn’t so good for us.

A Hunter-Gatherer's Guide to the 21st Century
A Hunter-Gatherer’s Guide to the 21st Century

My Thoughts

The authors are evolutionary biologists and they had some interesting takes on life as a whole. While I agree that potato chips aren’t the best for me they certainly are sooo good and that makes my lizard brain happy. However, I think it is too easy to conflate happiness, wellness, and fitness. They are certainly linked but just because our ancestors were fit, toned, and tanned, doesn’t mean wouldn’t enjoy a nice hot bath and a good long sleep on a mattress.

Recommendation

Great read.

Origin: A Genetic History of the Americas

Background

Origin: A Genetic History of the Americas was published February of 2022. It discusses the first inhabitants of the Americas and gives several theories of how they populated the continents.

Origin A Genetic History of the Americas
Origin A Genetic History of the Americas

My Thoughts

Great book and very thought provoking. It makes me wonder how much civilization we could find just off the coast of Alaska… The book talks about different waves of inhabitants based on the information we have so far. I wonder what more we can learn as we get new information.

Recommendation

Great read.