Published in Oct 2017, The State of Affairs is a book discussing the contemporary view on marriage and sexuality. More particularly about why people stray from their marriages and commitments in general.
The State of Affairs
My Thoughts
Talk about a depressing book! As someone who has experienced divorce and being cheated on, this book was not only painful but insightful. I am consistently trying to learn and grow from my experiences and this book gave me some things to think about.
One of the hardest things of post-marital life is confronting where I had issues. (Some of which I didn’t know about until I remarried.) Some of the main takeaways here was that her affair was different for her than it was for me. This book had me break away from some of the black and white thinking I had on the issue. It also was a good reminder to talk through a dozen more things with my wife.
My favorite line from the book was, “I’d recommend having an affair like I’d recommend getting cancer.” I wholeheartedly agree.
Recommendation
I told my wife it was worth the read but I wouldn’t recommend it to everyone.
Originally published in 1994, Why Marriages Succeed or Fail is a book from Dr. John Gottman about warning signs and what to do if your marriage is in trouble. The book has tests and guides for the individual to help tailor their treatment to their needs.
Why Marriages Succeed of Fail
My Thoughts
A great book full of useful information. You can’t help but be nicer to your spouse while reading the book.
It is from the 90’s though so it was interesting to read through some the statements that likely wouldn’t play well today. (E.g. Gender norms and so on.) I believe we have swung pretty far out there and I believe Dr. Gottman’s book to be closer to my belief system.
Published in October of 2015, You Are Worth It is the story of the youngest medal of honor recipient, Kyle Carpenter.
You are Worth It
My Thoughts
This is an inspiring story of a Marine who never gave up. The book is simply his story told in a forthright and honest way. Kyle Carpenter is a clean cut, honest, thankful, and all around good person. He is someone to look up to in this world.
Published back in 2005, 1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus, is a compilation of information of American life before the Europeans started visiting.
1491
My Thoughts
My thoughts are all over the map on this book. The narrative is so different from that which I was taught that I find myself questioning the sources. However, if true, the information is pretty amazing. The notion of the Americas as a completely settled land and that it was domesticated by the native peoples is pretty amazing. After confirming with my sons in High School, this is indeed what is being taught in the school curricula. I will have to find some supporting information but I did enjoy the book.
“The 6 Keys” is a book written by Jillian Michaels that explores the six essential pillars of health and wellness. In this book, Michaels draws on her years of experience as a fitness expert and life coach to provide readers with practical advice on how to improve their physical and mental well-being. The six keys include nutrition, hydration, sleep, mindfulness, movement, and community, and Michaels provides detailed guidance and strategies for how to optimize each of these areas in one’s life. The book is designed to help readers achieve a balanced and healthy lifestyle, leading to increased energy, vitality, and overall well-being. Published in October of 2018.
The 6 Keys
My Thoughts
I was looking for a book that would help me motivated to lose some weight and exercise. This one did pretty well. While I’m not particularly a fan of Ms. Michaels, I thought she had some good ideas in the book. (There were some things over the top as well such as replacing your furniture with only solid wood due to the harmful effects of “off gassing” from pressed wood.) She attempts to make cellular functions and nutrition understandable and her general approach is close to my personal beliefs of moderation in all things.
Recommendation
A good book for motivation but can be long in places.
Published in Sep of 2020, Think Like a Monk is the quasi-autobiographical experiences of a man who left relative wealth and success to join the Vedic monk lifestyle at an ashram in Mumbai, India. This book gives some of his story, some life lessons, and his thoughts in general.
Think Like a Monk
My Thoughts
I really enjoyed the book. In fact, I was on several long plane flights with a nasty case of poison ivy and I found his breathing techniques very helpful.
The real gem I found in the book was the perspective on introspection. What do we really need and what do we really want? I believe it is a very good idea to sit down and really think about your life from time to time.
Recommendation
It was a fun read. I would recommend it to anyone.
Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain was published in 2013. The following was taken from Barnes and Noble.
Drawing on important new research in the field of interpersonal neurobiology, Siegel explores exciting ways in which understanding how the brain functions can improve the lives of adolescents, making their relationships more fulfilling and less lonely and distressing on both sides of the generational divide.
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/brainstorm-daniel-j-siegel-md/1116149182 taken 5 June 2021
Brainstorm
My Thoughts
I was surprised by this book in that I didn’t get that much out of it. It’s true Dr. Siegel spends some time talking about adolescents but none of it was really a revelation. Perhaps I’ve read too much of this kind of literature but it seemed like this was more about how the brain works than specifically how the adolescence brain works or what to do about it. The author peppers the book with personal stories and observations. Most of which seemed to be effective in getting across his message.
Recommendation
It was okay. If you are unfamiliar with how the brain is organized and how it changes through normal development, this may be a good book for you.
“How to Be Human: An Autistic Man’s Guide to Life” was published in April of 2021 and is the autobiographical account of Jory Fleming, a high functioning person with autism who won a Rhodes Scholarship for the University of Oxford. A writer (Lyric Winik) did a series of interviews with Jory and strung them into the narrative that became this book. The book attempts to explain how Jory thinks and his perspective on life.
How to be Human
My Thoughts
Though I found the material interesting, I don’t believe it is relatable to other people with autism. To paraphrase Jory, “this is just how I think” and “I find it harder to relate to other people with autism.” My hat is off to Jory for what he has been able to achieve. Or more specifically, my hat is off to Jory’s mom who has given him daily support for his entire life.
Honestly, I’m bothered by some aspects of the popular notion of autism. There seem to be many people who romanticize autism and seem to see it as a net benefit. (E.g. Someone might claim a person with autism has an above-average IQ. These people evidently don’t know what autism is or how IQ is measured.) While these people aren’t actually diagnosed with any disorder, they are more than happy to claim the benefits as they see them. The usual humble brag is something akin to “I have Asperger’s.” This is usually an excuse for being socially awkward and/or a poor attempt to claim superior skills in analytical tasks. However, I’m not sure most of these people have been confronted by someone who has severe autism. Someone who is incapable of communication and truly does not “see” the world around them. Just like Jory’s mom, there are unsung heroes who devote their lives to making the world a better place for these people.
In short, all of us think differently. Autism is a spectrum which means there comes a point when the spectrum bumps up against the “normal.” Of course, that leads to another question, “What is normal?” Answer? “Normal” is just another bell curve of behaviors. The line between “normal” and “autistic and even “sane” and “insane” is uncomfortable thin. It all comes down to definitions and those definitions are always in flux.
So… I believe there is likely a little autism in all of us and we are all just a little off. That doesn’t give us super rain-man mental powers and most of us are able to negotiate society. We all feel awkward at times and some of us are insensitive jerks. It’s how we play the hand we are given which makes the difference. If it was all you could do not to kill someone on the way to work then I say, “good for you!” (However, if that’s how close you are to the line, expect the rest of us to lock you up somewhere safe in the near future.) The rest of us will continue doing what we can to do our best, day by day and sometimes hour by hour.
Published in 2007, On Call in Hell is the story of a man who served a tour as a Marine officer and later became a Navy doctor. He shares his journey and juxtaposes those two perspectives as he served in Iraq.
On Call in Hell
My Thoughts
I’d never met a Marine who went into Navy medicine so this was an interesting read. Still, I’ve met a number of Navy Corpsman and the attitude was pretty close to what I would have expected. I would have preferred it be read by the author since some of the saying didn’t quite come out correctly. I felt like there may have been a bit of humble brag going on but hey, it’s his book.
Recommendation
A very interesting look at a relatively unknown field. If you have interest in military medicine, I feel this book would be a good place to start.
Published in Sep of 2011, What it is Like to Go to War is a book about the psychological impacts of war and becoming a warrior. The author (a Vietnam veteran) makes the argument that we should do a much better job preparing our warfighters for what they will encounter in theater.
What it is Like to Go to War
My Thoughts
Certainly, a thought-provoking book and one set in its day. It had been 10 years after the 911 era and the author draws a number of parallels to his time in Vietnam. The more I learn about that war and how our warfighters were treated, the sadder it becomes. It is interesting that the trend of remote war is becoming more and more prevalent as the Marines are deactivating their tanks and towed artillery batteries. There have been so many changes that it is only natural we won’t be able to adjust. Particularly, as we’ve all had a year of being sequestered from others. The term I hear most often these days is “resilience.” We say it is important but I’m not sure we know how to get there…
Recommendation
It is an important topic but the content is dated.
